A bizarre and hilarious look at surviving societal collapse…
When Armageddon hits you can’t always pick your post-apocalyptic companions, That’s the dilemma facing major-league scout Riley Knight, who finds himself stranded with a collection of borderline crazies at a remote diner when a gigantic solar storm plunges the world into the dark ages.
Cut off from the rest of the electricity-deprived world, the group, whose grip on sanity is tenuous, and whose coping skills leave much to be desired, are forced to rely on each other with laughingly absurd results. As their situation rapidly deteriorates, the distant town of Jericho becomes their only hope for survival. Only the road to Jericho is fraught with peril that only the bravest of them may survive. Worse, Jericho may not be the safe haven they desperately seek. How will they survive this new bizarre and frightening world where everyone’s a nut in a place that’s getting nuttier by the day is anyone’s guess.
Praise for Surviving Crazy:
“A downright hilarious look at ‘the end of civilization as we know it’… A funny book in the ‘slap him in the head style of comedy’ but this goes deeper.” — Readers Favorite 5 Stars!
“An exceptional and original novel that holds the reader’s fully entertained attention from beginning to end. An impressive and deftly crafted novel populated with memorable characters and unexpected plot twists and turns” — Midwest Book Review
“With a long, character-building fuse and a whip-smart pen behind the imagery-rich writing, this novel hums with tension and possibility from the start… Surviving Crazy is a head-scratching read that will make you laugh out loud and stay up late to see how it all plays out.”— Self-Publishing Review
“I thoroughly enjoyed this goofy, comic novel, and laughed out loud through much of it. The characters are wildly drawn, and the satire is sharp and pointed…The ending is surprising, ironic, and perfect.” — Readers’ Favorite
“A colorful burst of comedy and satire.” — RedCity Review
“An ingenious, humorous novel…a thoroughly engrossing,rib-tickling-funny read that lovers of both SF and literary fiction won’t wantto miss.”…The Prairies Book Review
“Anentirely new perspective on end-time scenarios. Readers should hold onto theirhats in this fast-paced story. It is bursting with troublesome yet loveablecharacters who fill this tale with hyperbole, danger, and amazing camaraderie” — US Review of Books
Excerpt
It was at that point in his near-death experience when Shephard said he saw the light appear in front of him, a bright embraceable warm radiance accompanied by a soothing voice calling him into it.
Shephard however wasn’t ready to comply just yet and began to resist. “I was yelling at the voice that I wasn’t going anywhere until it did something about that jackass Floyd Monroe. I mean I was livid. I wanted some action.”
The voice tried coaxing Shephard into the light by promising him that it only wanted to talk for a brief moment before it sent him back into his body. Then Shephard could take care of Floyd anyway he wanted. It sounded like a reasonable compromise and so Shephard headed off into the light.
What happened next according to Shephard was his face-to-face meeting with God, or who he presumed to be God. “He kind of looked like Mr. Feathers.”
Mr. Feathers was Plucky Rooster’s national mascot, a giant red rooster famous for his straw hat and bib overalls.
Riley’s look of disbelief was shared by Shephard. “I know. I was expecting God to look different too. Something along the lines of a bearded, silvery-haired guy in a white robe. Naturally, I began to think I was getting conned.”
About The Author
Frank Crimi is a writer and the author of Surviving Crazy. His other books include Raining Frogs & Heart Attacks. Frank is married with two sons and two grandchildren.
Four years have passed since the lillipads fell and Etyom slipped into darkness. The New Black Death has mutated again, spreading to near epidemic proportions. What little order existed in Earth’s last city has disintegrated into chaos.
Rippers roam the Vapid, robbing and leaving their victims butchered. The Robusts have spilled out of their broken enclaves and hide in any dark corner that will conceal them. Meanwhile, the elite Graciles, fallen from their pristine towers in the sky, have all mysteriously disappeared.
Demitri is a prisoner in his own mind. His demon, Vedmak—now known as the Vardøger—is manipulating Demitri’s body to execute a secret plan far more disastrous than even the Gracile Leader dared.
Mila, her status among the fractured resistance elevated to that of Paladyn—a protector of the people—leads the fight against zealots intent on destroying what little remains of Etyom. It is a responsibility she never wanted, a calling that prevents her from doing what she truly desires.
Yet, Mila should be careful of what she longs. Caught between annihilation and loyalties that refuse to die, she must reconcile a single immutable truth: following your heart comes at a price.
Previous Book in the Series
Sci fi, dystopian, apocalyptic
Date Published: May 22 2018
Publisher: Vesuvian Books
The world you know is dead. We did this to ourselves.
The epidemic struck at the end of the Third World War. Fighting over oil, power, and religion, governments ignored the rise of an antibacterial-resistant plague. In just five years, the Earth was annihilated. Only one city survived—Etyom—a frozen hellhole in northern Siberia, engulfed in endless conflict.
The year is 2251.
Two groups emerged from the ashes of the old world. Within the walled city of Lower Etyom dwell the Robusts—descendants of the poor who were immune to the New Black Death. Above them, in a metropolis of pristine platforms called lillipads, live the Graciles—the progeny of the superrich, bio-engineered to resist the plague.
Mila Solokoff is a Robust who trades information in a world where knowing too much can get you killed. Caught in a deal gone bad, she’s forced to take a high-risk job for a clandestine organization hell-bent on revolution.
Demitri Stasevich is a Gracile with a dark secret—a sickness that, if discovered, will get him Ax’d. His only relief is an illegal narcotic produced by the Robusts, and his only means of obtaining it is a journey to the arctic hell far below New Etyom.
Thrust together in the midst of a sinister plot that threatens all life above and below the cloud line, Mila and Demitri must master their demons and make a choice—one that will either salvage what’s left of the human race or doom it to extinction …
Bronze Medal Winner — 2019 Independent Publisher Book Awards — Science Fiction
The young man in the brown jacket spins, arms raised high, a blood-curdling scream issuing from his lips. A few awkward steps and he falls, sprawling headlong across a pile of slush and rubble. A crimson fan spreads out under his corpse, staining the snow red. Another death, another friend of the cause, gone.
He was seventeen.
All around the pop-whizz of gunfire followed by deafening explosions from detonating grenades reminds us all the Kahangan stronghold of Nazal will not fall easily. I slide farther into the frozen mud of the ditch and scrunch into a ball.
“Mos.” Where the hell is he? “Mos, you with me?”
“I’m here, Mila.” The barrel chested Kahangan with midnight skin crawls up next to me, careful to keep his bulk below the rise.
“Who’s hit?”
“Mauricio.”
“Is he dead?”
“He’s not moving.”
“Sniper?” Mos jerks his head in the direction of the building before us. Politsiya in faded Cyrillic letters adorns the ruined facade.
“Knows what they’re doing too.” I pull a small mirror from the arm pouch on my leather jacket and slowly raise it to get a better view.
In the reflection is the form of a person, prone on the roof of the palace—if you can call it that.
A glint of light bounces off the glass.
I snatch my hand down and pinch my eyes shut as a chunk of earth explodes from the rim of the ditch, showering us with wet clods of cold mud. The lingering crack of a rifle follows. He’s got a sarding scope and a good, stable position. Guy definitely knows what he’sdoing.
“There’s a way up to the roof on the back side,” Mos says. “I can flank his position and approach from behind if you can keep his attention.” He cocks his head. “That’s probably stupid, huh?”
“It’s only stupid if it doesn’t work.”
Mos, already shuffling away, motions to a few others hiding in another ditch to follow.
“What are you going to do?” I ask.
“Wait for my call.” Mos grins, revealing large, square, white teeth, then creeps away and seems to vanish into thin air.
The cold seeps through my clothing, stealing the fading warmth of the sun. My scarred Kalashnikov rifle feels like a cold, lead weight. I exchanged my bean-bag propelling weapon for a death-dealing one some time ago. I don’t even remember when that happened. Like everything else in this forsaken city, it just sort of did. Yeos forgive me. I loose my canteen from my satchel and take a shaky swallow of the nearly frozen water.
A bark, much like a wild dog.
The signal. “Now!”
I drop the canteen, roll to the left, and rise to one knee. Three more of my fighters appear and the air ignites with the sounds of war. Dust and stone billow around the sniper’s nest. Our suppressive fire has the desired effect: he’s blinded by debris.
“Ceasefire!” I kneel again, the Kalashnikov pressed into my shoulder, watching as the dust clears. “Stand ready.”
We wait in silence, a bitter wind snapping at our scarf-covered faces.
Another flash of light from the roof.
“Get down!” I flop into the muck.
This time there is no report. No exploding clump of earth. A cry of terror fills the air, followed by the sounds of a struggle. I chance a glance. Mos is standing tall and proud on the roof.
“Hold your fire!” I yell.
My comrades lower their weapons. Mos reaches down and plucks up a skinny Kahangan who drops a long-barreled rifle. The little man screams, flailing madly against my friend’s superior strength.
“Traitor.” Mos bellows loud enough to be heard, even from down here. With a single heave, the large Kahangan hurls the sniper over the edge. The man’s hollow scream is cut short as he strikes the frozen ground some ten stories below.
I force myself to peer down at his mangled corpse, twisted like a broken doll in the ice and mud below. The Kalashnikov drops to hang from its canvas strap across my chest. My people follow suit, relaxing their guard, their eyes glazed over in a mixture of relief and stress. They’re all good soldiers. Committed to the cause—peace in Etyom, the last city. The Kahangan civil war has been going on for too long. Kapka—who somehow managed to survive the RPG blast on the platform four years ago—continues his campaign against the followers of Yeos with renewed vigor, but has so far not managed to take this Musul faction. Instead, in this desolate place, power-hungry warlords fight over resources while the people suffer. Here, it’s not Kapka who reigns, but Nazal.
Little is known of the origins of this despot. Some say, like all warlords, he simply rode to power on the broken backs of the Kahangan people. That there was nothing he wasn’t willing to do and no one he wasn’t willing to betray to claim the power he felt was owed to him. Others seem to whisper of his evil deeds like he’s some sort of phantom—a terrible consequence of our own divisiveness. Whatever the case, Nazal is a plague. He’s no Kapka, but the piles of corpses he’s left in his wake can no longer be overlooked. The resistance will stop him because someone must.
About Stu Jones
A veteran law enforcement officer, Stu Jones has worked as a beat cop, an investigator, an instructor of firearms and police defensive tactics and as a member and team leader of a multi-jurisdictional SWAT team.
About Gareth Worthington
Gareth Worthington BSc PhD EMBA is a trained marine biologist and holds a doctorate in comparative endocrinology. Gareth works in the pharmaceutical industry helping to educate the world’s doctors on new cancer therapies.
Kevin shouldn’t be writing this. And you shouldn’t be reading it. After all, reading is now a crime–and for good reason. After the Coma Outbreak, everyone knows what happens to people who read. Their eyes slam shut. And they never get out of their desks again.
About the Author
Patrick Hueller is the author of several award-winning books for young readers, sometimes under the pen name “Paul Hoblin.” Foul, a horror book, was a YALSA Quick Pick and was described by Booklist as “unbearably tense.” The Beast was a School Library Journal selection. Archenemy made the ALA’s Rainbow Book List. Wolf High and The Wish were on SLJ’s list for “Accessible Reads for Struggling Reluctant Readers.” He is also the author of the middle grade series Stu Stories, which Geoff Herbach (author of Stupid Fast and Hooper) said “hit[s] on pretty much every topic I cared about when I was a kid (love, Jedis, severed legs, etc.). His most recent book is Kirsten Howard’s Biggest Fan, a YA book published by INtense Publications that National Book Award finalist Charles Baxter called “beautifully written, with a concert-hall perfect pitch for speech and idiom and ways of feeling.”
